I had four cavities. FOUR. Now I just have four more fillings in my mouth. And a numb face.

Here’s the worst thing about this morning, and perhaps the worst thing one can ever hear while enjoying a visit to the dentist: “Oh, you aren’t supposed to be able to feel that.”

Fantastic. Apparently my mouth requires about eight shots of Novocaine as compared to the original three he figured would do the trick. I have to be honest though. What exactly is accomplished by having nerve endings in one’s teeth? Teeth don’t obey my commands, they can’t wiggle about in my mouth if I so desire. Just don’t get it. The only thing accomplished by the presence of nerves in my teeth today was that I now understand why people are afraid of the dentist and that awful drilling noise.

I’m sure most of my readers take much better care of their teeth than I do so you’ve probably never found yourself laying in the chair in the dentist’s office, face numb, four different apparatuses sticking out of your mouth, wishing your dentist would realize that though one side of your mouth is numb that doesn’t mean the other half is and his hand resting on your lip which is poking into your canine doesn’t feel great, and wondering, ‘What the hell is happening in my mouth right now,’ but that’s where I was this morning. And it is impossible to ask any questions during this process, though it sounds like the dentist and hygienist have no relationship and a forced conversation about Survivor is taking place over your head when the nice thing would be for them to explain what they’re doing as they do it.

But since that is apparently unnecessary, the only knowledge I gleaned from my appointment is that Boston Rob is apparently just as devious as ever and it’s shocking the producers of the show are allowing him to do whatever scandalous thing he’s doing this season. And of course now I’m on CBS.com watching episode one of this season. I think perhaps my dentist is being paid to sponsor Survivor.

Since I had a few questions (ie, Why must they DRILL into my teeth when they are trying to patch a hole? and WTF is that blue light thingy?), I’ve done some research while my face regains some feeling. For those that are curious, they drill to remove the ‘brown’ part of the filling (this is disgusting…and also highly questionable as I found this information on YAHOO Answers) and then to rough up the tooth so the filling will stick. And the blue light just sets the filling and dries it quickly. And now that I’ve read this, I remember that my sweet dentist I had most of my life back home actually DID explain the process and I knew all this already. Apparently, old age is setting in.

As a bonus, I will quickly relate the fun doings from my birthday gathering last night. I think the whole thing can be summed up by saying that the advent of camera phones makes letting loose around friends and coworkers a risky undertaking. They look like they are texting! But they are actually taking a photo of you stuffing your face!

Also, I must thank a few people for making the time to hang out with me last night. I have yet to create nicknames for any of my coworkers at this job (crazy! I’ve worked here for over six months!), so I suppose it’s high time I rectify this situation. The Café Queen gets a special shout out for spearheading the whole event. My Rock-Star-in-Businiess-Casual friend, I think (I was still feeling the effects of my margarita at the time), apprehended my bill and paid it, which was incredibly generous and I thank her whole heartedly. Off-the-Grid Friend made a late appearance and I hope I didn’t embarrass myself too thoroughly. Apologies, if so. Not that he’ll read this… And Sweet-but-Naïve friend rounded out the gathering. All in all, a good time was had. By me. I can’t speak for them 🙂

In closing, I would like to say that I’m quite pleased that my face is numb because I went to the dentist, not because I am still drunk from last evening. A win for my ever-tested self-control!

Today is my 26th birthday. No, this isn’t a post designed to solicit birthday wishes from my readers (although I’ll be happy to receive them if you are of a mind to leave some for me). Really, it’s a rumination on my first quarter century. Here’s what I’ve accomplished:

  • I’ve graduated from high school and college, without ever failing a class and only cheating on one test, with negligible success. I suck at both cheating and lying, apparently.
  • I got my drivers’ license on my first attempt and (knock on wood) have not yet caused a collision while driving. I’ve been told, variously by my mother and by my high school friends that I am both an excellent driver and a terrible driver. I have no idea how to respond to this, other than to say that my clean record speaks for itself. Right?
  • I met and married the love of my life. No word yet on procreation, but at least I have half of the process accomplished 🙂
  • I got a tattoo, 2 weeks after I turned 18. No, I didn’t really think that one through.
  • I’ve partaken of a variety of wines, beers and mixed drinks and still prefer the first alcohol I ever had: NyQuil. Just kidding. I guess the second alcohol I ever had is still my favorite; amaretto sours are delish!
  • I’ve lived and worked in New York City. What an amazing place… it’s less scary every time I visit. For the most part.
  • I’ve saved lives. Preventatively, at the very least. Being a lifeguard was satisfying on many levels: 1- life saving, of course. 2- tanning. 3- getting paid to tan.
  • I’ve taught high school math. At one point in my youth, I thought it was my calling. At many, MANY points during that year, I realized it definitely was NOT.
  • I once attended a Star Trek convention. ‘Nuf said.
  • I’ve worked for my mentor. I don’t think I appreciated it at the time, but working for this particular woman was really quite an honor. I learned so much… I wouldn’t be half so good at what I do now if it weren’t for her.
  • I’ve gone potluck for a roommate and wound up with a best friend and perhaps the only female I’m truly compatible living with.
  • I’ve watched my best friends settle down in Birmingham while I frolicked around Mobile and now Auburn. Nothing wrong with these places, I just miss my girls.
  • I found that I really can write a novel. And it wasn’t nearly as hard as I thought it would be.
  • God has taught me more about patience than I could have ever guessed I needed to learn. Long-term planning is something I plan to do sometime in the long term. I have learned to be satisfied with what I have, right now.
  • I have perfected the art of procrastination. I am actually writing this post one week prior to my birthday, which sounds like the opposite of procrastination, I know, but what’s really going on is I’m putting off writing on my novel, which needs to happen. Soon.
  • I still have two of my wisdom teeth.
  • I have read Pride and Prejudice at least four times in the last six years. I can’t seem to get enough of it! Same with the entire Harry Potter series. I’ve read them all at least four times each… most of them five or six times. I’m trying to branch out and read something new this month. I’ll let you know how that turns out.
  • I’ve been a member of three churches, none of which I currently attend on a regular basis. Gotta get on that.
  • I have become an avid and successful online apparel shopper. I thought I hatedshopping! Nope, I enjoy browsing online. I just don’t enjoy browsing in a store. With other people. And with salespeople. Ew.
  • I have been to Disney World five times. Never enjoyed it more than I did when I went as an adult.
  • I’ve had twenty-five birthdays and the ones that I remember most are the ones where I acted like a jerk. Once, when I turned four, I pouted and sulked when the party was coming to a close and I wanted to keep playing with my cousin. And when I turned twenty, I spent the morning with my fiance in Mobile and drove four hours home to spend the evening with my family and I can’t remember exactly what happened, but I specifically recall taking a perfectly good book (well, it actually was a terrible book) and ripping out each page and stomping around my bedroom in circles and making a huge mess. I think I was a crazy person for the afternoon.
  • I’ve filed taxes like, ten times.
  • One of my front two teeth is fake, as a result of abrupt contact with a glass storm door. I don’t recommend running through a doorway unless you know there isn’t a sheet of glass between you and your destination.
  • I have never once met anyone more famous than Miss America (Heather Whitestone), nor have I seen Dave Matthews in concert, despite numerous attempts.
  • I was once an obsessive fan of the band of brothers, Hanson. Yes, it’s true. And no, I’m not ashamed to admit it.

I could continue, but I think that just about sums up the first quarter century I’ve been on this planet. What’s in store for the next? I can’t think of anything special that happens when a person turns 26… I suppose most major milestones in a person’s life have already passed by this point. But certainly, with that list of accomplishments, I have a lot to look forward to, right?