Normally, I’d leave the ranting to Jenny, but I’m going to step up to the plate and offer my thoughts on both diners and employees of any given restaurant. (I was actually going to write about how incredibly awkward it is to eat at a restaurant by oneself, but I got so distracted by the weirdness of the goings-on around me, I forgot how awkward I felt and therefore decided to change topics.)

  • Does it make me incredibly unromantic to say that I think it looks stupid for two people on a date to eat on the same side of the table? Well, forgive me if so, because I really do. I can not think of any situation where this is appropriate, except in your own home. I tried really hard to give this one couple credit: the table that would have been between them was extra wide, but still, it just looked silly. It’s not like this restaurant was very crowded or loud – Wednesday night at 8:30 pm? It was pretty empty.
  • No hair-netted member of the kitchen staff should be seen in the dining room. Ever. No exceptions.
  • Please don’t look judgingly at the single girl eating her bowl of soup in the corner while you sit with your large family laughing raucously. She already feels awkward enough.
  • All restaurants should have little games to play for adults while they wait for their food. Heck, I’d even take the little coloring book / place mat they give kids. But there is nothing worse than pretending to read text messages on your phone in an attempt to appear occupied. Occupation is key for happy diners.

I think this pretty much covers my issues from tonight. But since I’ll be dining alone often over the weeks, months and perhaps years to come, I’m sure I’ll have plenty more to share. I’ll keep you updated.